sex warehouse

Congratulations to my friend Lori Graham, who I am currently torturing through my home's renovation, on making the cover of November's Metropolitan Home. She was selected as a "hot new designer" along with several others from across the US. Pretty amazing, Lori! Congratulations.

I am really getting tired of the words, "I am NOT gay" coming out of the mouths of public officials, preachers, and other closet cases after they are caught with their pants down with other men. I mean technically, the statement is probably true for many of them, but come on, aren't we splitting hairs here? These hypocrites seem to be saying, "Don't be disgusted by me, I am not Gay. Be disgusted with the terrible mistake I made getting caught having sex with a man."

The latest example is State Rep. Richard Curtis of Washington, who was being blackmailed by a 26 year-old waiter/call boy with a lengthy criminal record, Cody Castagna, pictured above with Curtis and NSFW here. Curtis met Cody in a porn store where Curtis and later requested and received unprotected anal sex (after agreeing to pay a $1,000 bareback fee?) in his hotel room. The money quote:

"The police report contains an account of how Curtis allegedly donned women’s clothing, red stockings and a black sequined lingerie top before engaging in a sex act at the store. He continued to wear them throughout the night under his clothing."

But remember, I am NOT gay.

Read the whole sordid affair, here. If the police have this story right, then this married with two children, conservative Republican, flag-waving, bible-banging, cross-dressing, prostitute-hiring, barebacking-fee paying, idiot needs to sell his story so this can be made into a TV movie pronto.

Thanks to Joe.My.God. for the pictures and 411.

Tonight was the annual running of the 17th Street High Heel Race, and as always, the spectacle did not disappoint, especially with a special appearance by Senator Larry Craig's wide stance. He was riding a toilet with handcuffs on and if you reached into the toilet bowl between his legs, you pulled out a bunch of Halloween candy. Sen. Craig was surrounded by airport security guards who pulled him up and down the street.

Sen. Craig was also surrounded by hundreds of men in dresses and thousands of people lining the streets. When I first started coming to the race, you could easily find an open spot to watch the fun. Now, you have to arrive by 6:00 pm or you will be fifteen people back and not able to see anything.

This guy looked like he was from the future. It sure is nice to see that they have Red Bull in the future.

This group of chunky girls performed a choreographed number on roller blades to the song "Bend and Snap" from the Broadway musical, "Legally Blonde." Very clever.

The race itself started at 9:00 pm and was a big blur of hair, heels, and glitter. All I can say is some of these men must have put in some significant practice running in heels because they were moving quite quickly. See for yourself by watching video of the race below.

I saw Roky Erickson at the El Rey Theater last night. For those who don’t know, Roky Erickson was the leader of the 13th Floor Elevators, the world’s first psychedelic rock band. The Elevators were from Austin, Texas, of all places. In Austin, Roky and the band faced constant harassment from the authorities who didn’t like their long hair and their anti-authoritarian message. Roky was busted for possession of a single joint. For this crime he was sent for three years to the Rusk State Hospital for the Criminally Insane where we was subjected to electro-shock treatments. Whether it was insanity or not that led him to smoke dope, by the time he came out of Rusk he wasn’t quite right anymore.

In the late Seventies he started releasing records again. But his lyrical themes had changed from starry eyed tales of spiritual exploration to dark examinations of the hidden horrors of the mind. Songs like Two Headed Dog, I Think of Demons and Creature With the Atom Brain found an audience among punk rock kids and Roky seemed on the verge of a major comeback. His song Bermuda (about the Bermuda Triangle) was a major inspiration to this young punk guitarist at the time. But bad management deals left him broke and by the early Nineties Roky was under the care of his mother who was ill equipped to deal with his deepening mental difficulties.

In 2001, his youngest brother Sumner gained guardianship over Roky and began to see that he got the professional treatment he needed. These days Roky is back and better than he ever was.

I’d never seen Roky live before, but the show I witnesses last night blew away any of the many recorded live shows I’ve heard. He was in amazing form. The years have made his voice even more abrasive, which only makes him sound better than before. Brian Wilson, whose story is similar to Roky’s in many ways, usually has a piano in front of him when he does live shows nowadays, though he rarely plays it and even when he does the instrument is not audible to the audience. But Roky played mean rhythm guitar throughout the show and even a few solos, all very much audible to everyone in the theater.

He was backed by a band he called Evil Hook Wildlife E.T., though the members looked too young to have been the original Evil Hook Wildlife E.T. who backed him in the Eighties. In addition to a firey lead guitarist, and rockin’ drums and bass, there was also a steel guitar player who added just the right touch of country to the sound.

I met Roky the day before at a book signing held at the Silent Movie Theater on Fairfax Avenue in LA. He signed copies of his new biography Eye Mind: The Saga of Roky Erickson and the 13th Floor Elevators, The Pioneers of Psychedelic Sound by Paul Drummond and presented the film Creature with the Atom Brain, the inspiration for his song of the same name. When I got up to the front of the line I asked him if he knew John Battles. John is a friend of mine from Chicago who kept a correspondence with Roky throughout the Eighties. Roky said he knew John, “He’s in Chicago,” he said, “He sends me lots of horror movie stuff!” I was impressed. With all he’s gone through it’s amazing he remembers his fans. “Thank you for bringing him up!” he said, smiling as he handed back my book.

Roky Erickson has always been kind of a hero of mine. Not for being crazy and taking drugs — which he hasn’t done for many years now anyway. But because of the way he sticks to what he does artistically in spite of everything. I’ve tried to approach my Zen teaching in the same way. Which is why you’re all cordially invited to bite me if you don’t like the way I do this stuff. Go find someone you do like and leave me the fuck alone, all right?

Anyway, for those that need to know, here’s the set Roky played:

1) Cold Night for Alligators 2) White Faces 3) Don’t Shake Me Lucifer 4) Mine, Mine, Mind 5) Two Headed Dog 6) Night of the Vampire 7) Bloody Hammer 8) Splash 1 9) The Beast is Coming 10) Creature With the Atom Brain 11) Starry Eyes 12) Before You Accuse Me 13) I Think of Demons 14) Bermuda 15) You’re Gonna Miss Me ENCORE: 1) The Interpreter 2) The Wind and More 3) I Walked With a Zombie

Got gigs in Ohio I should remind you about:

November 7th at 7PM I'll be at the Akron Public Library downtown.

November 7th (same day) 0DFx (the hardcore band I played bass in in the early 80s) will play the Matinee in Akron after the talk at the library.

November 9th my movie Cleveland's Screaming will be shown at the Beachland Tavern in Cleveland. There'll also be live performances by 0DFx, CD Truth, Cheap Tragedies and This Moment in Black History.

November 10th 0DFx plays at the Spitfire Saloon in Cleveland.

November 12th I'll give a Zen talk at Lambert's Tattooing and Body Piercing (I kid you not) in manly, he-man Mansfield, Ohio at 7PM (Sponsored by the Mansfield Zen Center).

Let me set the stage for you. I am hanging out in my house with my friend, having just walked back from lunch. We went into the kitchen to get some water at about 3:00 pm. As I was talking to my friend, I looked out my kitchen window that faces the alley between Q and Corcoran Streets. I saw two people in the alley, one black and one white, near the back entrance of the house across the alley. I turned to my friend and said, "Are they having sex? I think they are having sex. Oh my God, they are having sex!"

We could not tell if the white person was a man or a woman, as he/she had on some makeup, looked somewhat feminine with long curly hair, and had a dick in his/her mouth. After 3 minutes of heaven, the white guy/girl looks up at the black guy and says something. The black guy reaches into his pocket and pulls out a crack pipe and smokes it, then hands the pipe to his cock-sucking friend who also smokes. I turned to my friend and said, "I think the black guy had the crack." He responded, "The black guy always has the crack."

After some more awkward, semi-hard cock sucking, the white guy/girl reaches for the crack pipe and the black guy takes it away from him and says something. The white guy/girl stands up, pulls down his pants, and starts to pull off what I thought was underwear until my friend screams, "Is that a DIAPER???" And it was. I even think the black guy was taken back by the diaper.

Maybe it's just me, but I would not have stuck my finger in the ass of a guy/girl who was just wearing a diaper, but it did not stop our black friend. He got a couple of fingers up there before he decided to move to the next level. It was here that we discovered that the white guy/girl was indeed a guy, because as he was bending over, we got a flash of his rather large ball sack.

At this point, this cracked-out scene had been going on for several minutes and I was hoping that one of my neighbors would come out and stumble upon these two and have a conniption fit. I thought briefly of calling the police, but then remembered a few times being in a similar situation (sans crack and daylight), so I didn't.

I could not believe they had not heard us screaming and laughing. We were only 20 feet from them and the only thing separating us was a window. As I moved my camera closer to the window, I accidentally bumped it, creating a loud "thump", which caused the black man to look into the window. We were busted, or at least I thought. He did stare at us, but continued violating his white friend for a few more minutes.

It wasn't until he pointed at us and smiled, that we realized we were truly busted. We both dropped to the floor and by the time we looked back out the window, our friends had their clothes back on and were gathering their diaper and crack pipe to leave.

Less than a minute after they left, the guy that lives in the house across the alley pulls up in his car and takes several shopping bags out and places them directly where the action had taken place. I am not sure if he could feel us watching him or if he could smell ass crack and crack, but he stood there for awhile looking puzzled. I love DC!

More:
Crackgate Watch the DC FOX5 News Story, cameraman finds diaper
What Would YOU Do ...for a Klondike Bar?

One of my friend's dressed as Abraham Lincoln for Halloween. Can you guess who?

UPDATE
I didn't notice in the first picture that he was dressed as Lincoln AFTER his night at Ford's Theater. Very clever...and twisted.

Have you guys seen this video yet?

IT IS FUCKING HILARIOUS LA!!!!!!!!!!


I laughed until I almost died ok!!!


Watch watch!!

MY LOONY BUNS IS HOT BENNY LAVA!!!!!!!!!!

It's damn fucking funny lar!

The writer of the English lyrics is someone called Buffalax (I googled him and he seems like just some WoW addict) and he is amazingly talented!!

I don't know how he can actually hear English within all these languages.

He also did a few more funny videos, here's a Japanese one:



SHIT! I knew your son!! MUAHAHA

Got a Russian one too!!



PORCELAIN IS THE SUREST PLAN!!!!!!!

PLEASE RESPECT THE CAVIAR!!


That's as logical as it can get!



Can't wait for Buffalax to do a Chinese one!

His talent lies in doing this man, he should set up a website and just keep doing it, everyday.

His job occupation? Subtitler.

Congrats to me!!

I'm flying to Macau tomorrow via no less than the magnificent Tiger Airways (trying to be ironic, in case you thought I'm serious)!!

I'd be going with Qihua and her BF so poor Mikey will be left at home alone for 4 days...

Tomorrow is the press conference for Fresh Air For Women, an anti-smoking campaign, and since I am one of the ambassadors I have to be there at 10am (Jesus!! Hate morning people).

Yesterday I bought a lo mai gai (is it spelt like that?) and I put it on the kitchen table for maybe 1 hour... The damn thing was wrapped inside 1 paper bag and the paper bag was wrapped in a plastic bag.

I took up the package, wanting to microwave it, and midway during the journey to the microwave a HUMONGOUS LIZARD JUMPED, literally JUMPED, out of the plastic bag.

He flew up scrabbling and wiggling in midway (in a rather comical way, if I were not the victim) landed with a heavy and cold THUD on the crook of my arm.

I screamed cold murder and flung both lo mai gai and lizard away while running to the bedroom and whimpered to a sleeping and confused Mike.

Amazingly enough, the lizard managed to get through both paper and plastic bag to get to the food.


AND WHAT THE FUCK ARE LIZARDS DOING EATING LO MAI GAIs ANYWAY?


Don't people who defend lizards always say, "Oh, lizards are good what, they eat our pests!"

IT IS ALL A FACADE I TELL YOU!

Lizards like our human food just like cockroaches do, and what's worse, they PRETEND to eat mosquitoes and the like!

CAN YOU PLEASE TELL ME, IF YOU ATE LO MAI GAIs WILL YOU STILL GO AND EAT FLIES AFTER THAT??

No right?!

Grrrr

I swear, these fuckers just hate me!!!!!


NOBODY ELSE HAS SUCH FREQUENT LIZARD TRAUMAS!!!

Maybe they know I enjoy killing their kind. Oh yes I'm gonna redouble my efforts in killing you all you know, you dirty ugly wonky-eyed muthafuckers!!!!!!

I'd extend my reign of terror to Macau, where I will also kill the lizards there!!


Soon, Macau lizards will be whispering to each other:

"Hey... You know that blogger Xiaxue? Came here! To our very own peninsula! She is going to kill as many of us as possible!"

Terrified, lizard two replies: "How do you know this?" while he cowers in his wall corner, and clasps a filthy hand to his mouth, thus nearly falling off the ceiling. Lizard One grabs hold of him just in time.

One says: "My cousin from Singapore told me! He came all the way here via a ferry and a budget airline and relayed the news, then died of exhaustion." Lizard one adds severely, "He didn't sleep for 2 days, poor boy."


MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok I might be a bit deranged.



I'd be back on the 31st, and will post about the trip!






P/S: Here's a photo of a lizard I smacked to death with my bathroom slipper.




It totally serves him right because he was hiding BEHIND THE TOILET ROLL.

I cannot comprehend why anyone would go hide behind toilet rolls unless their purpose in doing so is to unleash themselves upon innocent girls who unfurled the roll of paper to wipe their asses.

That place (behinde the toilet roll) is not particularly fragrant and it is definitely not a good insect-catching spot.

Therefore, this lizard is evil.

Since he is evil, I chased him into the shower area and sprayed him with terribly hot water and when he is momentarily paralyzed, smacked him with my bathroom slipper.


SMACK!


Once, and he twitches. Oh, still alive, aren't you?


SMACK!


A last feeble twitch.

SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK!

Flush corpse into toilet bowl. Revenge is sweet.

I killed one more lizard with this method.

That lizard also deserves it because he was drinking water from my bathroom.

We have to pay rent and water bills of the precious water he is drinking, and did he ask permission? NO. Sorry, water not yours to drink, therefore deserve to DIE.


Besides, he was probably the one who dared the toilet-roll-lizard to sit there and hop onto my hand after I shat, thinking it is very funny.

VERY FUNNY NOW THAT YOU LOOK LIKE THIS, HUH??

Just when you think you have seen it all, something like this pops up on Andrew Sullivan's blog.

Tribune Photo/BARBARA ALLISON

Heather Gaut, 23, and Jordan Campbell, 19, talk about riding out the tornado in the Beauty and Body Works Salon on U.S. 6 in Nappanee Thursday night, where Gaut's sister, Angie Oldmstead, 31, was having her hair highlighted when the storm hit.

The tornado hit at 10:30pm. Who gets highlights that late at night? The good news here is that in exchanging emails with Heather, she told me that her sister's hair came out perfect.

Xiaxue's Guide To Life: Episode 5 - The Princess Room

Learn how to furnish a princess' room if the princess happens to be poor.



News Asia: Episode 4 - Iron Crotch and Castration

In this episode - amazing video footage of a man with an iron crotch, and a tragic story of another who got his penis chopped off.

Wow. Lookee. I got a big ol' article in the Associated Press. A writer named Eric Talmadge showed up at our retreat in Shizuoka in September in order to write a story about it. Though he had no great interest in Zen, he made it through the entire retreat, all those millions of hours of zazen, work assignments, meal services, ceremonial crap and the whole bit. That's a dedicated writer! Heck, Jim Krane, my old friend and bandmate from the legendary Eric Nipplehead Project, writes for AP and all he does is run around Iraq interviewing soldiers and militants.

Seems like this Eric -- Talmadge, not Nipplehead -- had a fine time at the old temple. You can find about a hundred variations of the article by typing in his name and mine into Google. MSNBC picked it up as did AOL and a bunch of local newspapers including one in Taiwan. Here are a few links I found.

Honolulu Advertiser

CBC

Taiwan News Online

MSNBC

Lubbock On Line

The El Paso Times

The Ventury County Star

The Clarion Ledger (this one uses a different photo from the others)

A list of various other places that carried the piece

It's always the same article with different titles, sometimes edited or expanded a bit. It's nice. The quote about "letting your mind shut off" doesn't sound like me to me. But who knows what the heck I say sometimes.

Recently I've been feeling that zazen itself in unassailable. If I can use a big word like that. What I mean is that zazen goes on as long as you hold the posture, no matter whether you're happy with it or not, or whether it feels like you think it ought to or not, or whether your legs and your ass hurt or not. Doesn't matter. When you go to a Zen thing just imagine it's like a weird yoga class where they only do one pose and they hold it forever.

Got gigs in Ohio I should remind you about:

November 7th at 7PM I'll be at the Akron Public Library downtown.

November 7th (same day) 0DFx (the hardcore band I played bass in in the early 80s) will play the Matinee in Akron after the talk at the library.

November 9th my movie Cleveland's Screaming will be shown at the Beachland Tavern in Cleveland. There'll also be live performances by 0DFx, CD Truth, Cheap Tragedies and This Moment in Black History.

November 10th 0DFx plays at the Spitfire Saloon in Cleveland.

November 12th I'll give a Zen talk at Lambert's Tattooing and Body Piercing (I kid you not) in manly, he-man Mansfield, Ohio at 7PM.

Some of you been complaining I don't write enough "dharma" on this blog anymore. Stop yer whinin' ya cry-babies!* I do an article every two weeks for Suicide Girls, which always has a link on the blog. Plus -- shee-yit -- I used to have to walk 15 miles through the snow at 3 in the morning to get just one little dharma sentence before I got booted in the face by my teacher and told to fuck off and die. Deal with it. Besides, I'm getting to the home stretch on my third book and the blog articles were getting to be a bit of a distraction from what needed doing there.

Rock on.

* Oh my God he insulted us. The Buddha said DO NO HARM!!!!!!!!**
** Get a life, numbskulls.

Nope, I'm not even joking, or trying to make fun of him.

Two days ago on the 19th of October 2007, in New York City, Jk Rowling revealed a nugget of information that would change the course of literary history forevermore (ok, I'm being a little dramatic).

I quote:

When asked by a fan if Dumbledore ever loved anyone, J.K. Rowling replied that... Dumbledore was gay. Reports from the scene say a hush fell over the crowd and then it broke out in applause, to which J.K. replied that if she had known that would be the response, she would've revealed her thoughts on Dumbledore earlier.

She went on to say that while she was reading Steve Kloves' script for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, she came across a passage in which Dumbledore was reminiscing about past loves, and she corrected it by crossing it out and scrawling "Dumbledore is gay" in the margin.

When I first read this on Mugglenet I thought she must have been joking, but I realised she would never joke about something like that.

OKIE...

Obviously I have nothing against gays (having a few gay friends myself) but I've always thought of Dumbledore as being somewhat ASEXUAL.

The idea of him humping someone, whether female or male, is disgusting and somewhat just can't be associated with his wise, serene character which we have all grown to love and respect!

The idea of him BEING humped is really even worse because it kinda puts him in a submissive position of weakness (I also think it is the most "demeaning" for females when we give a BJ or are being fucked... When we are doing other stuff men can respect us, but at the moment when sex happens, I just think it's not very possible, you get what I mean? It's like we are the weaker sex).


... =(

The idea that Dumbledore has an alternative sexual inclination opens up a world of other possibilities, such as...


- Aberforth liking bestiality. And goats too! I don't think much of his taste. Goats are smelly.

- Fenrir liking children (I dearly wish he didn't rape the kids before making them werewolves).

- and of course other characters being gay too: Dobby (likes Harry Potter!!), Sirius, Mad-Eye, Pettigrew, Voldemort etc etc


Did Sirius like James?

Of course, in Half-Blood prince Rowling already touched on the topic of incest, but I don't know... why DUMBLEDORE???!

I'm a bit annoyed... I wish Rowling didn't tell us this.

Well since I stupidly poked into Mugglenet and found out about this, I shall now spread the news to everyone who reads my blog too, so that they too can be troubled/cheered by this.


It makes me think of Dumbledore having sex and wanking and doing BJs and surfing porn, and I DON'T WANNA!!!


In my mind Dumbledore doesn't even lao sai one lor, coz he is so powerful and clever he doesn't do mundane things like shit.

Now I can never read the book the same way again!!!

I don't wanna know if he is gay or straight or whatever... He should be celibate and asexual! Things like sex shouldn't interest him.

A few days ago I wrote on my facebook that my favourite book is the whole Harry Potter series, and I also added that I wanted to ask Rowling is Dumbledore is gay.

Am I prophetic or what?!

To my utter surprise, I got my question answered almost immediately. I always thought Rowling would fend off that question by saying that this is a children's book and such issues are not of any importance.

Oh well!

I must say I admire her courage! Afterall she says that she values the latter above everything else.


TO HELL WITH ALL THOSE RELIGIOUS PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA COMPLAIN AGAIN!! Wizards cannot be homo one meh?!


p/s: Lockhart also gay.

p/p/s: Dumbledore liked Gellert Grindelwald. I think that's why he didn't wanna duel him till much later. Dumbledore likes blonde boys!! And smart ones la, of course.


My source here, if you don't believe me.


I don't care if most of you don't read Harry Potter. I read it all the time and it's my life!

Growing up in Northern Indiana, we were constantly practicing "tornado drills" in school. The alarm would sound, we would open the windows, calmly walk out into the hallway, get down on our knees against the wall, and assume the "safety position" of your head to your knees and hands over your head. A few times it was not practice, a tornado or funnel cloud had been spotted and we had to stay in hallway for what felt like hours. During those times, I secretly hoped that a tornado would hit, destroy the school, and take me away like Dorothy, but it never did.

Although I am not claiming responsibility, a high end EF3 tornado with winds reaching over 160 mph finally did hit my hometown area of Nappanee, destroying over 250 homes, 3 RV manufacturing companies that are the largest employers in town, and several small businesses and restaurants.



My cousin, Larry Thompson, who is the mayor of Nappanee, a normally very easy job, will have his hands full with the clean-up and rebuilding efforts. I just wonder how the town will survive with three of its largest employers being destroyed. That said, knowing the people of that area and that sickening "can do" spirit they possess, I am sure Nappanee will be just fine.

Let me give you two examples of this spirit. Two days after many of the kids in the NorthWood High School band lost their homes, they placed sixth in the state high school marching band competition at the RCA dome in Indianapolis. The football team had to postpone their sectional game because of the tornado damage and then play the next day on a neutral field, coming away with at 37-35 victory on a last minute safety after a fumbled snap. Now that is what I call moving on.

Artist Spencer Tunick got several hundred people to get naked and douse themselves in champagne for a photograph in Miami. Sounds kinda fun doesn't it?

What a frightening headline. According to the Washington Post article the tanker truck was carrying 7,100 gallons of diesel fuel and was taken at gunpoint from a gas station near Baltimore, then recovered in DC. That makes me feel safe.

But what was more frightening was this bit of "news" from the NY Daily News:

Jimmie (J.J.) Walker of "Good Times" fame dined at Elaine's with Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh.

For real? Now that is some scary end of the world type stuff happening there.

Nothing.

That's right, nothing!!

Nothing out of the blue that is - except that a China manicurist pissed me off real bad yesterday!

The story begins with me doing hair extensions again (together with Kaykay), although I swore never to do it again because it made me lose so much hair!

The problem is... although my hair is long, it is just not long ENOUGH, and the price of the extensions was going to a new low of $1 per strand!!

$1 for someone to bind a bunch of real human hair to your damn head and make you gorgeous!

And according to the China lady (they are everywhere in the beauty industry, I tell you) who did the extensions, the real human hair they buy comes from poor ladies (or maybe men, I don't know) in China who sell their hair to pay for school fees and food, etc!!

I asked her if the hair is shaved off a corpse (si ren de tou fa, I said) and she looked at me as if scandalized and said it is impossible.

I asked her how she would know for sure, and she (rather annoyed) replied that she may not know THAT for sure, but she is quite certain that the mainland Chinese won't go shave off their freshly dead relatives' hair for money coz it is disrespectful!

Hahahaha...

Kaykay and I then continued to laugh and joke about the dead person's ghost confirm very annoyed that she is uglier than the rest of the ghosts coz she got no hair, and I concluded our highly intellectual discussion by saying that ghosts are ugly ANYWAY... not like with hair will look much better.

Imagine hor, if afterlife really exists and you look like how you were just at the end of your life, wouldn't you be super pissed off if you jumped off a building instead of taking sleeping pills to commit suicide?

I must keep that in mind if I ever wanna die.

Digressing even further, Mike says that he thinks that when people die, NOTHING happens.

When I asked him what he means, he asked me back, "Did you ever go under (general anesthesia)?"

I told him no (my nose job's one I was fully awake), and he said it is a really queer feeling, like you just stop being in existance.

Nothing.

Just a little part of your life was lived without you even knowing it.

You wake up later and that period when you were down is just a... blank.

Isn't it scary?

I told him that I am mortified of death because I think that when people die, their souls are trapped inside their immobile and dysfunctional bodies, just exactly like how we are when we sometimes get the "bei gui ya" (a Chinese saying meaning 'trapped under a ghost') feeling.

For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, sometimes, when you get really tired and you fall asleep, you wake up and you are actually conscious of your surroundings, but you just can't move your body!

Not a muscle. Well, I think its possible to like twitch your fingers but that's about it.

So you just sort of loll around in bed under you finally, with a might jerk, wake yourself up.

It's a terrible, terrible feeling and I HATE IT! I always get it when I take afternoon naps!

And what if after we die THAT happens? Except we can't even jerk ourselves awake ever again!

I wonder when in that state we can actually feel PAIN? You think? What if when we die (ie break our neck) we can completely feel pain but can't move or express it!!

OK I got to stop this topic and go back to hair extensions.

But why so many people claim to have seen ghosts but they never ask the ghosts what happens when people die ah?!

Ahem. As I was saying, hair extensions are now $1!

Usually I'm very generous when it comes to fashion advice, but this time round I'm sorry that I can't tell you people where I went to do it, because the damn place is already super full usually and so many people are doing extensions now... if everyone also got super long hair then I won't be special anymore!!

I did 40 strands of ashy brown hair (exactly my shade!) and wanted to do 40 strands of blonde...

Then I saw another shade of blonde... instead of yellowish blonde it is ashy platinum blonde!!

I chose that one istead, and the girl told me that's a "highlight colour", which means it is $0.50 per strand!

SUPER HAPPY LA!!!

In the end it only cost me $60 for the whole head!


You can't tell, but the hair like reaches my ass ok! When I sit down, the ends sweep my thighs!! And the quality of the corpse's hair is so much better than my own! Happy happy happy!!

... And the blonde and brown looks like peanut butter chocolate swirls... :)

So anyway, I went to do my nails at Bugis Village with my mom after I got the extensions right, and this was how the conversation went, in Chinese:


Me, to China manicurist: "Wow, you all should do hair extensions too... It's all the rage now."

CM: "Yeah, we are doing it. Didn't you see the signboard outside?"

Me: "Oh really? I just did mine yesterday! How much are you all charging?"

CM: "$5 per strand."

Me: "FIVE DOLLARS?!! I did mine for only $1!! The blonde coloured ones are even cheaper, 50 cents!"

CM: "Ours is 100% human hair."


... I fucking HATE it when people who way overprice their products try to say that their products are better than other people's with their stupid weak accusations that theirs is BETTER.

I MEAN FUCKING CMON. Nobody uses bloody synthetic hair for hair extensions ANYMORE lor! The plastic hairs all tangle up really bad and they just are horrible!


Defensively I told her that my extensions are 100% human hair too.

How do I know? Because plastic hair will melt with hair curlers, and I've curled my hair a bazillion times!


To my horror, the woman stopped filing my toenails and hooked a strand of my blonde hair with her finger to examine it.

"Hmm..." she said, spreading the strand out and studying its minute molecular structure. "Yours is not real... Surely has some fake hairs mixed into it."


And disregarding my incredulous and offended look, she ACTUALLY PLUCKED OUT ONE OF MY BLONDE HAIRS FROM MY HEAD, BROKE IT IN FRONT OF ME, AND PROCEEDED TO BREAK A FEW MORE.


I screamed at her, "Please stop doing that!"


LAO NIANG FUCKING PAID FOR ALL THOSE BEAUTIFUL BLONDE STRANDS LOR, THEN YOU GO AND BREAK THEM LIKE VERY FUN LIKE THAT!


Indignantly she took a poor broken piece of blonde hair in front of my face, and holding both ends of the hair, tugged ruthlessly at it to see how elastic it can be before breaking!!


"See... I think it's fake," she announced weakly, because the hair behaved exactly like how normal hair would behave.

She went back to doing my nails while I suppressed the urge to strangle her off her tiny stool.

Quite annoying lor!




Abrupt end of story.



Sorry I've been so absent... I've actually took photos of the Princess Room (finally it's ready) but they are not edited yet.

It's all facebook's fault! I'm officially hooked on it! And Ms ZS! I keep talking to you online for hours!!!



(Please DO NOT add me. I don't add people I don't personally know. That is, if you see me on facebook.)


Today I hu-ed Yao Jiu Da Pai!! Nan feng was my winning card!! Yi Wan, Jiu Tong, Hong Zhong, Nan Feng (my wind) and Bai ban (eye)!!

Yao Jiu Da Pai is add 2 doubles coz it is a special right?

6 doubles plus 1 animal and 1 flower outside - whoopee!!

Ok I just wanted to record that. This is my blog afterall lor.

It looks like my niece, Carmen, inherited the Eby trait of not being able to "fake it" when doing something you don't like. Every last part of her looks annoyed and bored with her line judging duties. Love her!

Several months ago, while watching Reno 911 with Marc, he mentioned that he thought Deputy Travis Junior was kinda hot and I agreed that there was something about him that was appealing in a dirty, dumb, hick-kinda way.

Well, imagine how shocked I was to see photoshopped picture of my brother's face on the body of Deputy Travis Junior, because someone mentioned that my brother looked like him. Needless to say I know longer find Deputy Travis Junior appealing in that kinda way.