I'm reminiscing, but not only about the pic above, which was taken nearly 2 months ago when the Frenchman O came to visit. (His dick doesn't look like a solid, fat 10 incher from this angle, but it really is). I'm also thinking about some of the shit I did as a budding masturbator when I was a teen. In retelling some of this stuff, I had my Jewish friend D laughing so hard over lunch the other day, he had to take his glasses off.
One story comes from when I was around 12-14 or so. I was in a hotel with my parents. They went out and I decided to stay in. Super horny as usual, for no good fucking reason other than that I had time to play with my favorite anatomical toy. (Absolutely nothing has changed about this feeling in all these years). You know those hotel rooms that share a door? I was curious about who was in the other room. At this point, I don't recall if hearing his voice in the next room made me do the following, or if I was just doing dumb shit just because...Um, probably the latter. Anyway, I found my grandmom's compact mirror and cautiously slipped it under the door between the rooms. After a bit of tilting, I could see a man (fully clothed), sitting on his bed talking on the phone. I was praying he'd get naked and start masturbating, but no such luck. Who knows how much time passed, but he eventually got up and left the room. Now here's where it gets super dumb, and by dumb I mean illegal. And by illegal, I mean hotness. Yes, here's where it got hotness. hahaha. I used my library card to break into the guy's room. Once inside, I guess I just didn't know what to do. So I jerked off into his soda can and went back into my room. BOOM! And scene.
The thing about being inappropriate is that one has to find similarly inappropriate people with whom to share and grow and, like, be inappropriate and shit. Puh-leese do not ask me how the (literal) shelf life of semen became the topic of discussion at lunch, but it did. And here's where I fell through the time warp once again. Don't you just know it? I tried to save my ejaculate when I was about 15-16. I dumped all the aspirin out of a bottle and decided to dump all my junk goo inside and see how long it would take for me to fill it. This was a project which, much like the contents of the bottle, was superbly short-lived. The next day that I went back to check on the spooge, the most rancid odor poured out of that tiny little bottle. I mean, sperm are living things. And what happens to living things when they die kids? That's right. They stink. A lot. No, a whole lot. So I didn't try to do that anymore. It would be more than a decade before I realized I wasn't alone in my quest to save jizz.
In college, I discovered (via Yahoo adult groups) that plenty of gay men were into this. They even bought the stuff from willing dudes who were into the fetish of being suppliers. I also learned the way to circumvent the deterioration of sperm is to stick it in the freezer. Yeah, at 15 I was definitely not doing that.
Oooh, boy and it's down the bottomless rabbit hole we go. Okay, one more. Still at that glorious age of 15-16, I was edging one night. I didn't have a name for it yet, but that's what I was doing. I had been at it so long and had been so high from bating that I felt a sensation I hadn't ever really felt while masturbating. I was SO ready to see myself shoot a fat nutt that I decided to just let it rip. Lying on my back I did just that. It took a few seconds before I realized what exactly was happening: I pissed all over myself, the bed and the wall! Beating my dick so long meant I hadn't done anything else for the last hour or 2, including going to the bathroom. My poor bladder took a beating for it. If you've never tried it, being super hard and jerking with a full bladder really does intensify the sensation. Just don't piss: unless that's your intention, of course. Now, I can jerk for 2 hours without feeling anything. Hell, 2 hours to an Edge Veteran like myself isn't even enough time. But then it was. Ah, THOSE WERE THE DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYS!
I've been having some issue lately in creating links for exceptionally long URLs. You know what to do. Just copy and paste. These are worth it. Then again, all the links I put here are.
http://dudesnude.com/show.php?id=714050&profile_view=1&window_depth=&PHPSESSID=bf3ba9b641566df92d0b6700a4cd5233
I want to marry this dude - http://www.modelmayhem.com/pics.php?id=109833
