[1] I believe sexuality pervades all social interaction, and that I am being sexual when I shop, work and play.
[2] Accordingly, I don't think any of our received ways of talking about sex do justice to the individuality and variety of sexual ways of being. I particularly reject the stupid hetero-homo scale which seems to make so much sense to others, but none at all to me. (But hurrah for this exercise in celebrating the variety of experience!)
[3] I am a 46 year old man who has had lots of relationships, long and short, and also a lot of time on his own. Every step along that way has shaped me, but none of it dictates anything that lies ahead.
[4] At this late stage, I believe I have found a partner who is pretty much ideal for me, whose entire being seems to align well and resonate with mine, and I can't have her because she is spoken for and lives in the wrong country and still intends to have kids, which I can't give her. But I don't want to own her, and I am over the moon to have her in my life at all. Our sex is the way I want sex to be. But it could be more often.....
[5] I love sex, and am capable of being as slutty as you like, under the right circumstances. I have proved that now and then, and would like to find occasion to prove it in the future too.
[6] I like playing with images, and would love to make porn with people I like, and to show it off brazenly. Showing faces and eyes is really important, as is acknowledging the act of making a picture. While commercial porn is pretty terrible, the recent proliferation allows a lot of non-commercial and arty stuff to grow around the edges and I find much there to like, and I try to contribute in some small way. Commerce makes porn stink.
[7] I have had sex very publicly on quite a few occasions. The world usually reacts well to that (though time and place are critical, of course).
[8] I hope to go to an orgy some day. Indeed, I think orgies are fine projects.
[9] Sex in love is incomparably better than sex for sex's sake.
[10] I have learned a lot from longer relationships and very little of note from casual encounters. Which is not to say that they were not fun.
[11] I love feeling horny, and appreciating other people. Being sexually charged changes the world. I am constantly molesting strangers with my eyes, but that's allowed.
[12] I don't think the details of who sticks what where are all that important, as long as fun is had, and everyone treats everyone else with respect. Beyond that, its all good.
[13] I've tried most "suburban" kinks. With someone else who gets off on them, I like most of them. But I don't get cross dressing. It turns me off. And anything to do with shit is simply disgusting. But that leaves a lot of play ground.
[14] I have had two partners who had tendencies towards self-harm that found expression occasionally in sex that involved blood and knives. That is incredibly moving, strong, and somehow wonderful. I still think its a lot less damaging than harming yourself alone in a room.
[15] Photos and videos of sex and each other have played wonderful roles in several relationships. It's been brazen, and I will never run for public office, because there's probably all kind of shit out there. But I don't care, and I have always treated the material as private. In fact, I have always eventually destroyed it after the end of a relationship. That pains me somewhat, and I would like to have more of a record. But I know why I destroy them, because you don't live in the past.
[16] I like cocks. Don't care much for the rest of men's bodies, and all my sexual encounters with men have been fleeting, often anonymous. But I like cocks.
[17] Because of 16, I have a special fondness for MMF threesomes, where I am with a female partner, and we share an invited cock as a guest. It is using the third party, but they usually don't complain, and they shouldn't! I have been fortunate to have experienced the MMF situation several times, with several partners, and it's pretty much been good every time, and great some times. It is massively indulgent. I have next to no experience of FFM though.
[18] I think my fondness for MMF situations as above is, in part, due to my hatred of jealousy. In enjoying that particular cocktail, all concerned are thumbing their noses at jealousy and ownership. I had a jealous wife. She pre-empted what she (wrongly) saw as the inevitability of me cheating, by having an affair that caused her to fall in love. When I found out, she killed herself. I really hate jealousy. I like love though.
[19] I would like to understand more about other people's sexualities. Even, or especially, people that would not be potential partners for me. I wish more older people contributed to this project. Perhaps they will. I would especially like to hear from people older than me.
[20] Sometimes I hate sex. Sometimes, it seems like it is a cause of suffering for so many people. It isolates. It causes pain. Desire without anywhere to go is a wound. Of course sex itself is not to blame. If we dealt with it better, we could all have so much more fun, and be happier in our own skins.
[21] I have, at times, felt woefully inadequate and lost. I have had sexual encounters that went wrong due to my fears and stumbling uncertainty. But I have also found resonance and wonder where I least expected it. It is 2009 and I still feel like things can begin, and there is newness and freshness to be had. But I'm going through a good patch (see [4]). Next month I may feel differently.
[22] Hangovers make me horny and passive. I could watch all day. I like that.
[23] I miss the random and inappropriate erections of youth.
[24] My first date with the woman who became my wife was to watch the movie Deep Throat. Hmmm.
[25] I'm a simple butt man who likes a world in which his love of a woman's butt can make her smile.
