GODZILLA RETURNS

There have been a slew of news reports lately that Legendary Pictures and Warner Bros., the combo responsible for the current remake of Clash Of The Titans, will be producing a new Godzilla movie for release in 2012.

It's kind of funny to see this. It's part of a story I've been following for the past few years. A guy named Yoshimitsu Banno -- named in the story linked above as one of the film's producers -- has been making the rounds in the US entertainment industry trying to get a new Godzilla project off the ground since at least the late 90s. Banno is an intriguing character. He is the only person to have directed just one Godzilla movie (not including the last US-made catastrophe in 1998). Most Godzilla movie directors get asked back after they do one movie. Banno apparently made the execs at Toho so mad they never asked him back.

Banno's Godzilla movie was 1971's Godzilla Vs. The Smog Monster, one of my personal all-time favorites of the series. It turns out that Banno didn't just pick a pollution-based monster as Godzilla's enemy because it was a trendy topic at the time. He was and is a big environmentalist. It has long been his dream to remake Godzilla vs The Smog Monster with a big budget as a way of calling attention to the serious environmental issues facing humanity today.

Apparently, Banno managed to purchase the rights to remake Smog Monster from Toho. But his efforts to get it going haven't been all that successful until now. Last I'd heard before this news came about was that he was trying to get a 15 minute Imax version made somewhere in South America. Or something like that...

ANYWAY, this all got me thinking that one of the FAQ's I get fairly often when I'm on tour from people who've read Zen Wrapped in Karma Dipped in Chocolate is, "What the heck ever happened with your job at the Godzilla company?" (which was not the company that made Godzilla, but was a company founded by the guy who invented Godzilla)

I left that unresolved at the end of the book because at the time I finished writing the book it was unresolved. What ended up happening is that I got fired. That's in the book, I think.

But then in September of 2008 I went to Japan to lead the annual Dogen Sangha retreat and scheduled a meeting with the company while I was there. It was at this meeting that they proposed for me to come back to Japan and work for them again at the Tokyo office.

I really hemmed and hawed on this one. I desperately wanted to return to Japan. I feel more at home there than I do anywhere else. And yet returning to my old job sounded unappealing. Besides that, Zen Wrapped in Karma was set to be released in the Spring of the following year and I wouldn't be in America to promote it if I took the job in Japan.

At the end of 2008 I had to make my official decision. So I moved in to the San Francisco Zen Center for three weeks, finished off the book, then called up Tokyo and told them I was staying in America. I officially quit.

And that's the story!

Remember that this weekend I'll be in Brooklyn at the Zen Center there running a retreat. There's still space available. All info is on this link here.

Then it's on to Baltimore and following that, Richmond, Virginia. All info is on the link referenced above.
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A few stolen moments in the backseat, Alameda Naval Base.

Copyright Shilo McCabe 2010
more images after the jump...

Copyright Shilo McCabe 2010
Copyright Shilo McCabe 2010
Copyright Shilo McCabe 2010

NAZI "BUDDHISTS" IN SRI LANKA FUCK OFF! and CHRISTIANS IN THE ZENDO!

Here are some "Buddhists" who don't have a fucking clue what Buddhism is all about.

This story just disgusts me to no end. I have no idea what the fuck is up with these so-called "Buddhists" in Sri Lanka. But I do not represent them and I want nothing at all to do with jack-offs like this. I hope they ban my books over there too. This kind of nonsense makes me embarrassed to call myself a "Buddhist."

The Jathika Hela Urumaya (the hardline "Buddhist" ruling party in Sri Lanka) can bite me! More power to you Sarah Malini Perera. This shit makes me want to convert to Islam too!

How's that for a typical Brad Warner style reasoned argument?

ANYWAY, the 2010 Southern Dharma Retreat Center Zen retreat with Brad is now done. So let me tell you about it.

I counted 18 or 19 brave souls up there in the mountains of North Carolina. As always this was a very interesting group. People come to Zen retreats for all kinds of reasons. One woman was a born-again Christian and missionary to Africa who wanted to check out this Zen stuff. One other woman was drafted in by her friend when her friend's daughter who'd originally signed up came down with strep throat. One guy went to Woodstock. One guy was a Rinzai priest (the enemy!).

Someone asked about doing zazen retreats for the "wrong reasons" or something like that. But I don't think there are wrong reasons. If you just come along to experience three days of peace and quiet away from the job and the kids, that's just as valid as someone who's all gung-ho about The Great Way of the Buddha. Maybe more so.

It was a bit of a hard retreat for me because I caught a cold on the first day. It was all I could do to just get through all the talks and stuff without keeling over. I felt a little bad about that. To make up for my lack of energy I read the group the intro to my new book, which takes place at the Southern Dharma Retreat Center.

See, last year, just before that retreat I'd been dumped by a woman I was truly crazy about (perhaps literally so). And I was feeling pretty broke up the entire time. I figured that story would be a good intro to a book about sex and zen. The rest of the book is less personal than that. I guess that's kinda sad for all the anonymous commenters who got all worked up that the book was gonna be a big catalog of my sex life. Maybe next time.

Did I mention I got recognized by random people while I was in Austin -- twice? No? It's true. The first one was a college student on Spring Break who turned around as we waited for a light to change and asked my name. I thought he was gonna try to sell me something! Turns out he's an avid reader of this blog! I'm sorry I've forgotten your name if you're reading this. But I forget names as fast as I learn them. The next was a guy at a CVS. This is getting spooky! (Hence the photo above)(It's a joke)(The star is for H.B. Warner, a popular star of the 30s now sadly forgotten)

This weekend I'll be in Brooklyn at the Zen Center there running a retreat. There's still space available. All info is on this link here.

Then I'll be at Sheppard College in West Virginia. The date is April 8th, but I don't have the other specifics yet. Then it's on to Baltimore and following that, Richmond, Virginia. So be there or be a Sri Lankan hardline "Buddhist!"

(And this: Oh my God(zilla)!)
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I Am Now The Proud New Poppa Of...



A Mac. Ta da! It's taken me so long to make the leap, but I have finally left my PC days behind. Just over the weekend (Saturday), I had an unexpected yet good hookup. It was a masturbatory/oral 3way with this sexy, bi Italian jock (with a gf, beautiful ass, large cum loads and huge quads) and a visitor from NYC. The visitor seemed to be of Latin origins, about 6', a little heavier than I originally thought (damn those close-cropped photos) with an uncut 8 incher. Bi Italiano was clearly not feeling this other dude. He doesn't like oral with guys he doesn't know and this other guy kept commenting how much he wanted to suck. Also, Latin Dude's body wasn't doing it for Italian Dude. Every time Latin Bro tried to touch him, Italiano would back up and move his dick out of the way. As the host, this made me uncomfortable, but we made it work. Latino wasn't getting wood at all because there was no dick in his mouth and I wasn't getting wood either because I was nervous about the dynamics. One guy who wasn't having a problem with wood was Italiano. His cute 5 incher was leaking precum like a faucet. Finally I got hard and let Latin Bro suck my dick. This seemed to please Italiano who soon announced he had to cum, which he did all over my dick. He left soon after, which allowed Latino and I to get down to some serious mutual sucking, like we wanted to do all along. It was a very good scene and it ended with me swallowing his nutt. Two days prior I headed over to Main Street Video for about an hour and a half of fun. And it really was fun. I hooked up with 3 guys. The first was an MSV repeat: Chubby Latino with a delicious dick who ate my ass with a fervor I hadn't seen since, well, since he did it the last time. He busted a nutt sucking my dick. The next runner up was a white, corporate-looking yet not unattractive guy who smiled sweetly and followed me into another booth after giving him the nod. We sucked each other, but he shot his wad on the floor while blowing me. Um, hello? What gives here? Can a brotha get a nutt please? lol. The third and final dude was without a doubt the jackpot. You know how you see some people and you think, "why oh WHY can't we be together?: Pitbull, Ricky Martin, Will Smith, Adrian Grenier, this guy, this guy and too many others to name.

This guy was like that. He looked Brazilian, had beautiful brown skin, was about 5'10", worked out, very masculine and too good to be true. At first I didn't even bother giving him the eye because he'd seen me and didn't seem to register me. Okay. I don't push. Then he walked past me again, got to the end of the short hallway, locked eyes with me (message received) and rounded the corner. I spoke into my shirt cuff, "the Dirty Bird has landed. I'm on it, Jim. Over and under, er, OUT - like Ricky Martin finally for God's sake. [Call me Quique. I'll be an excellent father to your kids.]) Once at the end of the hallway, I looked at him, he grabbed his crotch and I walked into the booth just beyond him. He followed. Uh yeah. The kissing was on: great breath, great kisser, excellent everything. We both removed our shirts and I couldn't believe the pecs on this guy. He looked good in his clothes, but damn. So sexy standing there shirtless with my hand gripping the back of his neck, staring (up) into his eyes, moving in for another kiss that felt like hot peppers (am I being racist?) We eventually worked the pants down around our ankles and took turns sucking each other. The uncut dick was awesome and he knew how to suck, as well. After several refillings of the video machine, I was back on my knees swallowing his unborn children. I shot my nutt as well. I told him that I didn't shoot much. So he wouldn't have to worry about me having shot in the underwear down around his ankles. We both kinda laughed at that. As he was pulling his jeans up, he got this strange, shocked expression on his face and said, "uh, you did cum in my underwear." Oops. I would pick that moment to be a shooter. Hee hee. Ain't I a stinka?


Hot German Sex Shop Barebacking

The pic above is me, as well as the video below. Enjoy.

Big Brother Australia Uncut. Looks like a helluva lotta fun.
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Crazy April!

In another 12 hours' time I'd be flying off to San Francisco!!

Can't say why yet but it's HUGE!!!!!!!!! Well to me it is anyway!!

I'm going on a press junket for only 2 days and I'd be rushing back by April 3rd so I can go to the Canon Symposium... Where apparently there will be 300 people listening to me talk nonsense. Why, I cannot understand. The Nuffies suggested I should charge for conferences though, which sounds like a swell idea. Just kidding, I'm way too lazy.


(Touch down at 10am, have to reach Symposium by 12pm. The Nuffies are worried sick that my flight will be delayed/cancelled. Won't one lah where got so suay, right? Right?? *Crosses fingers)


Anyway April is a crazy crazy month for me!!

Here's the ding dong schedule:


30th to 3rd: San Francisco

6th to 8th: KL for Project Alpha press conference and *maybe* a FHM shoot

10th to 11th: Bintan for a friend's birthday

14th to 18th: Tbilisi, Georgia - to also talk at a conference with Gillian

23rd to 10th May: Dallas for our annual trip back to see Mike's family and also for his younger brother Paul's wedding! Omg I'm so excited!!

I'm excited about all the trips! Talk about living out of a suitcase man. Confirm don't need to unpack, maybe only transfer from big suitcase to small suitcase.

Ok I'm gonna curl my hair now see ya guys in 3 days!
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Psycho bitch

I think twitter is awesome because it is somehow even more revealing of people's personalities than blogs are. That's coz when people blog emotional posts it's triggered by certain feelings. I like to blog when I'm pissed off, so that's the constant emotion that's portrayed here (in the text parts anyway).

Some people blog when they are happy. Some when they are emo. And therefore only certain personality traits are shown.

But on twitter you see happy tweets and angry tweets and bored tweets etc etc!

And then there are psycho tweets. So I'm gonna blog about this psycho bitch who keeps replying me on twitter.

A few days ago I went to Far East Plaza and walked past my tattoo's artist Jeremy's shop. So I stopped by to say hi and enquired where Jeremy is.

One of the staff/owner there said Jeremy is no longer here and is in Europe. I don't know if I heard wrongly or whatever but he also said that Jeremy is not coming back. I asked why and the answer is coz can earn more money there (in Europe).

So I tweeted that I'm sad coz Jeremy is no longer available in Singapore. And that when you mix talented people with publicity, they will be so busy and successful you can't use their services anymore!

Jeremy was featured in the first episode of Guide to Life but when I was talking about publicity, I WAS NOT TALKING ABOUT ME GIVING HIM PUBLICITY.

I was talking about publicity in general, which talented people are bound to get, from me or whoever!!

(Even if I'm talking about me so what? Truth is I've sold out many products before!)


Enter psycho bitch:





Very polite and normal right? She is apparently the cousin of another Tattoo Artist, E (whom I've also met and like quite a lot, he is also v talented), and supposedly Jeremy is gonna work with E now and will be back tomorrow or something. But I have no idea how true her info is coz as mentioned, psycho bitch.

So I just replied pleasantly that I'm happy Jeremy will still be in Singapore and that I must have got or heard wrong info from the guy in Jeremy's old shop.


THEN THIS DING DONG......














WTF MAXIMUM??????????????

So I misheard info also cannot is it? She @messaged a bunch of people to complain about how she cannot stand me and all... With shitloads of logical fallacies!

(none of these people replied her wtf)

Kena accused of feeling like a "LOSER". What has "feeling like a loser" got to do with me not screaming at her? Totally don't get it.

And why the hell would I scream at her when she was so polite to me?

I didn't even see her crazy timeline (obviously I don't follow her) till today coz another follower informed me about her (I presume this follower kpo went to see psycho bitch's profile).

If not for someone informing me I'd think this girl is so nice lor! Then never mind.

She must have read my reply (I replied before I knew how psycho she is) about misunderstanding the ex-colleague of Jeremy's, so she tweeted:





Two more perfectly normal, nice tweets.

So I got curious after seeing the first few abusive tweets, and I went to read her timeline all the way from the beginning. And here it is, chronologically:





In reply to my tweet about Heidi Montag's surgery. I replied that Heidi told Hello magazine she did 10 surgeries in one day. Her reply:



Psycho bitch being nice.

And in reply to my tweet about attending my first wedding as the couple's friend, not relative:








And in reply to me doing eyelash extensions:



Such a sweet girl!



Another nice tweet



In reply to me buying a hat for my ROM.
(I didn't reply or replied positively)



AND 30 MINS LATER:

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WTF?? WHAT DID I DO?




Logic fail.



I really don't know.

And you know what's the funniest thing??

SHE IS AN ASPIRING WEDDING PLANNER!!!!!!!!!!!

MAXIMUM IRONY!!!!!!!!!!!!


Here's a tweet she wrote:



So you don't get why you don't get clients, but everyone who is or will be a client in future is a bimbo who can't plan their own wedding?!




When did I ever said I'm classy?!?!





Then why are you constantly replying me like you like me?! WTF?


And a mere 4 hours before her abusive "tattoo artist" tweets, she was teaching me how to cook lady's fingers:




PSYCHO!!!!!!!!!!!



I can't decide if she hates me or loves me.

p/s: Comments containing her URLs will be deleted.
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I SURVIVED THE AUSTIN DHARMA PUNX RETREAT

Here's a photo of the survivors of the Austin Dharma Punx Zen Retreat 2010. We all made it through alive, but just barely!

The retreat was held March 18-21 at the Recreation Plantation campsite a little ways outside of Austin, Texas. My first teacher routinely runs retreats at campsites in Ohio so I figured this would work out OK. But I was too busy with moving across the country to attend to the specifics of the event and did not realize what I'd gotten myself into until I got there.

The zendo was to be a covered pavilion. I had imagined an enclosed space. I should have looked up the word "pavilion." It turned out to be basically a roof over some picnic tables. This obviously wasn't gonna work. So we decided to use the nearby covered stage for a zendo. This at least had a floor. It was a raised stage, about three feet tall with a roof but with no walls.

The weather was good on day one, and I was starting to become hopeful that the retreat might work out. It certainly wasn't an ideal situation to sit zazen in the open air. But it was do-able. The ten of us made it through, a little chilly but OK.

That night I spent my first ever night in a tent. It was freezing cold, which kept me wide awake until close to midnight. I finally slept. But at about three in the morning I woke up to a rustling noise outside. It sounded like either a person or an animal as large as a human being walking around in the grass just outside my tent. Since the nearest other tent was about fifty feet away and down a hill there was no good reason any of the retreat people might have been hanging out in front of my tent at that hour.

I switched on my flashlight and tried to sound threatening as I squeaked out, "Wh-who-who's there?" I unzipped the tent flap and saw nothing but grass and trees. It was then that I realized the wind had kicked up during the night and that what I was hearing was just the rain fly of the tent rubbing against the tent itself.

After a while I settled down enough to sleep, although the cold was even more intense now, which made sleeping even harder. But I'm a light sleeper so every time the rain fly rubbed against the tent I was up again. I wasn't scared anymore, but I couldn't sleep through it.

The next morning the wind was a lot harder than it had been on the first day. We'd set up a tarp on one side of the "zendo" to provide some kind of a wall so that participants weren't staring out at the pavilion. But the wind started whipping the tarp around like crazy. We'd weighted it down with heavy rocks and a cinder block. But the wind was strong enough that these were sliding all over the place. I cut the morning zazen short so we could fix the problem.

It was clear we weren't going to be able to continue this way. So we reconvened and decided to pay an extra fee to rent a tiny cabin on the site. This was basically a two-room shack, about the size of a large bedroom. We managed to squeeze all thirteen participants (three more had arrived on the second day) set up our Elvis Buddha on a book shelf to make a kind of altar, took off our shoes and got down to some zazen.

This went all right in spite of the cramped quarters. In fact the small space made for a nice sense of camaraderie among those involved.

For the second night I and one of the other participants elected to move into the shack rather than sleep in tents. The others bravely stayed outside. Which was fine until 6 A.M. when a huge thunderstorm hit. The temperature dropped by something like 20 degrees in an hour or so. Lightning was flashing on all sides and the rain was as hard as I've ever seen. Oddly enough 6 A.M. was the time we were to begin the day's zazen.

We decided to follow the schedule at least until lunchtime. We'd be OK in the cabin. At lunch we had a mass meeting and decided we were going to finish out the day. But there was no way we were going to spend the night in the mud and rain.

I'd promised to do dokusan in the afternoon. One of the participants offered her tent. So I bundled up with two jackets, two hats and a big black thermal blanket and started doing one-on-one interviews with the members of the group who'd asked to speak with me.

This actually went better than I'd have imagined. But I was surely glad when the final interview was done and I could go into the cabin where it was a couple degrees warmer.

We tore up stakes then and went to one of the participant's houses for dinner. Several of us were from out of town. Space was donated by kind local folks and we all went back to sleep in warm beds or at least couches.

The Austin Zen Center was nice enough to let us use their space to do the last couple of sittings the following morning. That's where the group photo above was taken.

As you can see we all made it through. It was hardly a disaster -- in fact it was kind of nice all things considered. Even so, that's the last time I agree to do a retreat in a campground without an enclosed space for zazen.

Phew.

Tomorrow begins the 2010 Southern Dharma Retreat in Hot Springs, N. Carolina. At least they have a fully enclosed sitting space and nice, heated living spaces for everyone involved! Then it's on to Brooklyn and Baltimore. For full info on where I'll be check out this link. See ya there!
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Memek Lesbi Ngentot

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1) I like obviously artificial makeup. I like dye jobs. I like band shirts. I like tattoos. I like hoodies. I listen to Panic! At the Disco purely because Ryan Ross’s outfits turn me on. Tim Burton’s aesthetic I love. I could care less about naked bodies.

2) I hate my breasts because they make my tight T-shirts hang weirdly and they mess up the lines of my torso. It’s all sleek and lean and feline, and then there are these two round things, and I hate them. I’m the only person in the world who picks their bras on the basis that they minimize my breasts.

3) Weirdly, breasts are the one of the few body parts I actually find attractive. Well, and guys’ pelvises and penises, and very occasional arms.

4) There is nothing hotter than a sweaty, unwashed musician shredding.

5) Unless it’s a sweaty, unwashed musician with a sexy voice. I have a playlist, actually. I prefer a low, gravelly, almost-tenor voice on a woman, and a waily, melodramatic voice on a man. Sex noises are always a plus.

6) I’m turned on by suicide, codependent relationships, mindfuckery and (fictional) serial killers. I have no traumatic experience. I just came this screwed-up, I guess.

7) Most of my fantasies involve someone having sex they don’t want to have because they’re so turned on, possibly because of the supernatural (yay incubi).

8) When I fantasize, I am almost always a man.

9) I fall in love at first sight about once every two years. Love-at-first-sight me has great taste—I’ve never fallen for someone I wouldn’t marry. Unfortunately, she’s not quite so good at picking out people who are interested in me.

10) In eighth grade I jerked off in class. Every day. It took three or four months for anyone to notice. I lied and claimed I’d just been resting my hand on my stomach because I had cramps. The adults believed me, but the kids mocked me for the rest of the year.

11) I’ve been turned on by my sister touching my back before. I’m not attracted to her at all and, obviously, I’d never sleep with her.

12) It is impossible to freak or gross me out with anything sexually. I blame the Internet.

13) I have two platonic friends, if you don’t count relatives. Everyone else I’d fuck, if they’d have me. (Note: this doesn’t mean I’m attracted. It just means I’d sleep with them, if they offered.)

14) I read erotica, but I hate porn. It doesn’t offend me or anything; it’s just boring. On the other hand, a singer grabbing his crotch on stage or lifting his shirt a little or pelvic thrusting gets me every time.

15) I almost always get crushes on people because I think they like me. Unfortunately, my brain tends to instantly jump from “they talked to me” to “they want to jump my bones.” In my defense, it works that way for me.

16) I’ve never fucked someone I’m honestly attracted to, as opposed to having a crush on because of #15. I’ve never had as good orgasms in regular sex as in masturbation.

17) Despite #16, I’ve never regretted a sexual encounter.

18) I crave pain during sex. It’s not necessary during masturbation, but screwed-up power dynamics in my head are.

19) I get distracted during masturbation and start thinking about random stuff. This doesn’t happen during sex. I like erotica, because it keeps my focus at the task at hand (pun entirely intended).

20) Naked cuddling is better than sex.

21) Sometimes I get so lonely I hug myself or a pillow and pretend I’m cuddling a particularly cuddle-worthy celebrity. I guess you could call it cuddling masturbation.

22) Of the blogs I check on a regular basis, about half are sex blogs. I like to stay informed.

23) I think I’m terrible in bed. My sex-to-male-orgasm ratio is quite embarrassing. I don’t want to have sex with someone else again in case it proves that I’m right. I’m more embarrassed by #23 than #11.

24) I can’t remember the name of my first kiss. I’m pretty sure I’m going to forget the name of my first fuck soon. I can, however, remember both my and their outfits from both occasions.

25) I think everyone in the world has beautiful eyes. No matter how ugly, or mean, or stupid the person: stare into their eyes and they are beautiful and someone you’d like to sleep with.
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"Blast" From The Past, I Love NY and La Tristesse




Via xtube, I cyber-reconnected with T, an executive pastry chef at an exclusive hotel here in town. We haven't seen each other in about 3 years. He's handsome, about my height (5'8"), masculine, openly-gay, thick-built (maybe 170# but HELLO he's a pastry chef), has an infectiously upbeat personality and is rib-splittingly, milk-out-of-your-nose, replete-with-impersonations HIlarious. Seriously. He's also won a ton of awards and recognition for his work. The first time we met, we must've sat and laughed for well over 2 hours until I finally got down to blowing that big penis of his. He doesn't have any face pics in his xtube profile, only his cock pic. He hit me up by saying something to the effect of, "hmm. I think I know who you are. Can't really see your face too clearly, though. See if you recognize this dick." And you know what? After a few days, I did figure out who he was. So we started communicating again and he promised to fill me with some of his heavy loads upon his return from New York. Speaking of which, I performed in Brooklyn on Saturday with the jazz band. It was fun and we did well. Picture it: A speakeasy set up in what looked to be a huge converted storage space, patrons dressed appropriately for the era (except for the dude in the red Billy Jean jacket. Um, I don't know either): burlesque, tap dancers, alcohol. And then there was Gideon.


I feel perfectly comfortable mentioning his name, a first for The Cum Log. It's not like we hooked up. In fact, we shared little more than a few words and the clink of our plastic, alcohol-filled cups as he looked down at me (he was about 6'2"), smiled charmingly (and seductively, though I think it was just his way) and asked my name. My friend and I had been eyeing him for the past half hour as he walked, no prowled around the joint. As I told him my name, his natural scent wafted over me and I guess I sort of, well, short circuited. Just for a moment. He smelled of...sex. If that smile hadn't done it (and it had), the sensual BO definitely made me want to spend the rest of the night in his company talking (and sucking, fucking, kissing, licking, spitting on, gnawing through and filling up each other over and over and over (forever and ever, ad nauseum, amen.) But, alas, our love was not to be. He spent the rest of the night cutting a rug with a few other ladies, and one in particular. Still, I couldn't help getting the vibe that somebody's dick had been in him at some point. By the time we finished our final set, it was going on 2 a.m. and time to drive back to Boston. There was some talk about attending the Black Party. (Mmm hmm, you know what I'm talking about.) But the flier for the event had been thrown away and we weren't exactly sure who to ask and how to follow up on its exact whereabouts. We also briefly toyed with the idea about heading back to the sex booths in Chelsea (we went there as soon as we hit Manhattan, but nothing was happening at all: wasted $10. Again, oh-fucking-well.) It's hard to go to La Manzana Grande and not hang out, but that's how it had to be.


Backing up a bit to Monday a week ago, my fellow sex buddy R came over and we split one of his viagra. Stop me if you've heard this (two black guys walk onto a boat, see the all white crew and say "oh HELL no. Nuh uh. Not again"...just kidding). R is the small-hung, mid-40s yet still fucking ridiculously baby-faced Italian macho homo with the equally small-hung also gay (but slightly more fem) brother P. I've been naked with them both, separately. I know. I keep mentioning that. That's my story and I've got to stick with it. While I never had sex with P (we attended hot nude yoga together and then a private, one-on-one, completely non-sexual, nude massage exchange about 2 years ago), I've had R's loads in me a few times. Last Monday was my chance to put my load in him. Until that day, I wasn't ever aware that his ass was for anything but evacuation. It was a very very (lower your voice a husky octave here) very pleasant surprise. He brought a bag of goodies (straight and gay bareback porn, lube, a towel, paper towels and two dildoes [one with a handle].) Yeah. Let the good times roll, right? He tried the smaller dildo on me, but those things just don't work on me. I can never get open because I prefer the real thing. After several utterly futile minutes in a very hot position (I was on my stomach sucking R's cock, while he was on his knees in front of me draped over my back trying to sodomize me with that thing,) he asked if I wanted to see him take it. Well, yeah. Sure. And he did.


It was so fucking hot watching his very masculine self moan and groan while I fucked him with it. Then, as if that weren't enough, he asked if I wanted to get in there. Folks, I did not have to be asked twice. I had that dildo out and my dick in faster than you could've sang Al Green's famous "Love and Hot Penis." (Those are the lyrics to that song, right?) R is a wonderful shit talker. He coaxed my cock by telling me to feel how soft he was inside. Fuck. I've never heard anyone refer to his hole and lips as soft, but they were. They drew me in, milked me and I felt so fucking good in that space. Normally, I can't top chest to chest. The position just doesn't work for me. This time it did. His eyes were half-lidded as he started to gently perspire, all the while beating his dick. Finally he brought himself to orgasm, but I knew it wasn't over because he always shoots at least twice. Fast forward about 35 or so minutes. He sat in The Chair, the very same one that P (not R's brother) pounds me on. BTW, he's scheduled to be here this afternoon to attempt impregnating me yet again. It never works, but I don't have the heart to tell him. It's still fun to try, though. We would have such cute, white and black/Native American kids. Even though I don't want to have kids with P. I'd rather have kids with donkey-dicked C (who I'm also meeting later tonight), but more on that budding half-romance a bit later. Le sigh.


So right. R's seated in the chair and I've got about 6" to 7" of the 10" handled dildo inside him. This time, I don't need to be asked. I pull it out; he slides all the way to the end of the seat; he holds his thick, strong legs up in the air by grabbing the backs of his legs; and I stick my dick right back inside him. Back at home at last. Oh God. Whatever you do. Please do not come back right now. At least not until I cum, which I knew I was going to have to do this time around. But to bust inside or not. That was the question. I mean, R's asshole had turned into an Accu-Jac and if I didn't decide soon where to put my spooge, that decision was going to very quickly be made for me. My thoughts went something like this: what2dowhat2dowhat2dowhat2dojesusohfuckohgodohshitmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmdontfuckingmovebecauseifyoudoimnotgoingtobeabletolionsandtigersandbearsandmammasaymammasahmammmacoosaaaahhhhh..........................................................................................................................................................................Um. Yeah. I came inside. Hey, you know what they say: too slow, you blow (inside.) But my fucking dick was still on brick as I pulled out. I don't think he knew. Mark that as the second time I ever blew my load inside anyone, two days back to back. (I am now doing the cabbage patch.)


Fast forward (again) to my feelings about C. I'm a little sad and I always get tears in my eyes whenever I'm alone and think of him. Granted, I'll be the first to admit it's not specifically him (though it ain't specifically not either). It's the idea of having a boyfriend again. Someone who sees that I'm not the most handsome man in the world, knows what I look like first thing in the morning and might possibly even like me anyway. C has seen me wake up with a halfro. You know when the side you slept on is all jacked and flattened, while the other side is still fluffy and round. It looks like someone halfway let the air out of a tire. Yeah. Not cute. I'm sad because he doesn't know that I'm a sex worker (as well as another hearty little tidbit, which I shall not divulge here quite just yet.) How can you love someone when you don't know who he is? You can't really. I have absolutely no moral issues having sex for money. When anybody asks what I do between music gigs, I can honestly just say sales. (Insert big shit-eating grin here.) Anyway, I miss being held through the night. I miss being softly kissed as I either wrap my lover around me or fold him into my arms. I don't necessarily want or need that every night, but I do need it sometimes. I miss walking down the street holding hands. And most of all I miss connecting emotionally and recognizing that we're working on something together, openly and honestly. I definitely had issues with those last two previously. But I'm not the same man I was 4 years ago for a lot of reasons and in some very important ways. I can be honest now (even when it hurts) and I'm no longer afraid to be communicative and trusting. And while I'm still a hard ass with a chip on my shoulder a lot of the time (I really am working on that), even hard asses need a soft place to call home.


The pic above is me.
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When in Rome, Fall in Love

Sponsored Review

Was invited to the premiere of movie When In Rome, starring uber cute Kristen Bell (trivia: She's also the voice of Gossip Girl!) and the uber cute Josh Duhamel (married to Fergie)!




I was so excited coz it is done by the same people
who did The Proposal, which was FABULOUS!




Oh Ryan Reynolds...
I think they have a heck of choosing the crazy cute male leads!


Went into the theatre expecting to be entertained and I was!!

I'm totally a sucker for romantic comedies. You know, easy to understand, funny, characters are always cute, and so lighthearted!

The start of the movie featured Beth (Kristen Bell) being totally unlucky in love, seemingly unable to find "The One" for her. Well, predictable enough. Upset, Beth picks up coins that others have thrown into the Fountain of Love in Rome. She thinks love doesn't exist and these coins were wasted wishing for it!!

Unbeknownst to her, the coins carry a spell and all the men who had the coins picked up started being mad in love with her!

Now this is when the movie starts to be really hilarious!! The stellar cast of funnymen really brought the movie forward with their antics!




Dex Shepard, who is Kristen Bell's real life boyfriend, plays a narcissistic model who is in love with himself.

He is my favourite!! So funny!! His one liners are soooo fantastic!! Like Derek Zoolander but worse.




Will Arnett (married to Amy Poehler), plays a crazy painter. I really liked him in Blades of Glory!



Jon Heder plays an emo Magician who isn't really that good with this tricks.

The last time I saw him was on Blades of Glory where is he BLONDE with feathered hair so I was just so amused by him in black hair and eyeliner! And red nail polish!! LOLOL



Danny DeVito, obviously needs no introduction, plays a sausage magnate.

His character was the most unfunny of all the guys though.



Last but not least Josh Duhamel plays Nick, an ex sportsman who actually got struck by lighting!! LOLOL... Very cute!!


*****


So. While smothered with the affection of these guys, Beth is on a quest to find out if Nick (Josh Duhamel) is really in love with her or also just under the spell! And how does she get these other guys to stop?

Well, I guess to find out you have to watch the movie and see what happens! There are many twists thrown in too!

I guess many girls can relate to this movie...

When you are looking to fall in love, there will be like NO GUYS.

After a break up, or when your exams are here/career is keeping you busy, all these guys appear out of nowhere and it's like you just don't know which to pick! I'm just kidding, I never had many guys like me at once. Boohoohoo!! Never mind lah I'm married already.

I don't believe in The One though.

I just believe that it's incredibly hard to find two people who both think that the other party is too good for them. When you get that extraordinary situation, where both parties find themselves really lucky, then they'll get past the first hurdle of whether they want to commit. Everything else can then work themselves out. :)

Afterall, The One should encompass your partner thinking you are his special One too, right? If not it's like stupid and one-sided and buay paiseh.



Ok enough yabbering! Now for the fun part!!


Wanna give your view of what
qualities "The One" should have?



Join When In Rome's facebook page to give your answer!! Just simply choose among a list of qualities which is the most important to you when it comes to finding a life partner!

I'm really quite interested in finding out the results for Singaporeans will be!!! I think it is "Stable CPF".

AHAHAHAHHA!! No lah... Maybe faithfulness? Loyalty? Being able to last more than 3 mins in bed? Could be anything.

Actually right now the results are slanted towards... DEEP POCKETS!!


I guess we are all materialistic afterall. LOL






Prizes to be won too!



Organiser!


Watch!


Keychain!


So cute! Well the items are obviously for girls so men who are cheapo/poor can try to win so you can give your girlfriend the stuff!

Or they can bring their girlfriends to watch the movie too!!!


Here's the trailer:



Have fun!!



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