here are two types of girls in the world: girls that think Katherine Heigl is the best thing since sliced bread and those who think Heigl is a menace to society and should be locked up in a cage, with someone shoving lard down her gullet and forced to watch “The Ugly Truth”…repeatedly.
I fall into the latter.
But can we please talk about this pandemic of dumb girls? (Not my readers, of course, if you find my blog funny, then you are a genius on so many levels.)
Seriously though, so many girls are the same nowadays. I have to make some of you wear Bump It’s just to remember who’s who.
Please stop being a cliché, girls with no personalities… that annoys me.
Maybe it’s just me, but I like my girls bitchy. I like my girls with some gusto. I like my girls to actually understand the definition of gusto.
I went to a college where majority of the girls had no names and just sucked dick…with their mouths and their overall personalities.
Girls that said:
“The movie “Letters to Juliet” just speaks to me in a way that no man really ever can.”
and…
“Wait…I thought Britney Spears wrote ‘(I cant get no) satisfaction’…”
and my all time favorite…
“I ate too much gummy bears last night.”
Really, small Asian girl on the bus that probably gives great head? Really?!
So I may be a little jaded…
But come on!
I’m no feminist, far from it. They annoy me, too. But where did this resurgence of “I have to act dumb to get laid” philosophy come from?
It would make me feel a whole lot better if you at least pretended that “When in Rome” was a movie based on pure fiction and not your slutty’s friends trip to Italy last summer while you intern at the pentagon.
“No, I swear to God! Jackie went to Rome and threw some coin into a fountain and then had sex with some Guido tourist and now they are getting married cause he knocked her up. Who are we looking for again, Osama or Obama?”
Just change your personality. Just change it. Change it or we’re going to do this the hard way, and yes the hard way contains lard.
